"Memoirs of the (Not-So) Grim Reaper" Available August 17th Exclusively from Amazon!
I am the writer of "Radar Love"; my contribution to the 100 Voices compilations of short stories
My human is hugging me on his lap. I’m wrapped up in a big old comfy towel. He is sad. I don’t know why, because I am real happy.
I have never been to this place. There are lots of smells; dogs and cats and other animals, too. I don’t like cats much. My human has one. I only met her once. That was three days ago when he brought me home. It has a fence and grass to run around in. The big building where I used to stay didn’t have any of that.
The nice lady human came with us. She lives at the nice house, too. I like her. She loved on me the first time he brought me home. She seems sad, too. I’m going to lick her hand for awhile. That made her smile, but she still looks sad. I don’t understand, but there is a LOT of stuff about humans I don’t get, so I’m just going to snuggle.
I didn’t used to have a home. The human I had before put me out of a car and left. I didn’t know where I was. I don’t see so good because of the thingies in my eyes. They make everything fuzzy. I couldn’t find my way home and it got bad. I couldn’t find no food and only mud water to drink. Then I smelled meat! There were humans eating by a big building. One of them tossed me a bone to chew on. He went and got another human who gave me meat and rubbed my head.
I had bitey things on me. He got some stuff and sprayed it on me. All the bitey things died; just like that! I couldn’t believe it. Then he carried me where it was cool in the big building. (I had a boo-boo on my leg and couldn’t walk so good.) The boo-boo hurt a lot. It was all red and icky. He put smelly stuff on it every day until it got all better.
He made a bed for me by his feet and got me food and water and a nice blanket. Then he put a little door in the big door so I could go in and out by myself. The building was huge so I had lots of room to run around chasing mice and possums and bothering the other humans.
One of the nice humans started calling me Radar. I’m not sure why. I’m pretty small. He calls me a Chi-hyena. He says I look like my mommy was a Chihuahua and my daddy must have been a Hyena. It’s funny.
My human took to me to the nice house once before. That’s when I met the nice lady. I think I could have stayed but a dog that lived there bit me. I got too close to her human and she got mad. He said it wasn’t safe for me there so he took me back to the big building.
I stayed at the big building for almost two years. My human would take me for a walk every day. Lots of times we would go down by the water. I got to walk around and sniff everything. Sometimes we would just walk around the block, but he always took time just for me. It made me happy. I never knew a human could love me so much.
Then I started to not feel too good a lot. I started making messes when I was sleeping. He never yelled at me. He told me “Good girl!” even when I peed and pooped in my bed. He would clean me up and never made me feel bad. I couldn’t walk too good anymore either. He would carry me when I got tired. I would put my head on his shoulder and love him bunches. Sometimes, he would stay with me when I was sick. He made a bed on the floor and slept right by me. It starting to get really hard to breathe sometimes and I kept throwing up my food. I was getting sad because I couldn’t see his face too good anymore. The thingies in my eyes were making the pictures go away.
Three days ago he packed up all my stuff. He put everything in the car. I don’t why, but then he gave all his stuff to this man, and we drove away. I didn’t care. As long as I was with him I was happy. I couldn’t believe it when we got to the home where he took me before! I was really nervous because of the other dogs, but he kept them away. He never left me alone and even slept beside me for three nights in a row. The first two nights was outside and it was really neat. Every time I woke up he was right there. I love him a lot. He makes me feel better even though I am sick.
The last two days were the bestest I ever had! We went to a place where dogs run around without leashes. There were lots of smells and other dogs, but I wasn’t afraid. I runned away two big pit bulls when they came into my building! He took me for lots of walks and carried me a lot of the time. My one leg doesn’t work so good. Maybe it’s because of the boo-boo I had a long time ago. We went to lots of places and I got treats; LOTS of treats. I even got ice cream for the first time. It was amazing! I still made messes in my sleep but all he did was tell me “Good girl!” and loved on me.
This morning I felt real bad. I threw up all my food again, too. He looked sad so I licked his leg until he smiled and picked me up. Then we went for a ride. The nice lady came with us to this place with all the dog and cat smells. Then another lady came in. She seemed nice but she tried to take me away from my human. He said “no” and wouldn’t let me go. I don’t know where they wanted to take me. He keeps hugging me and telling me he loves me. He is smiling at me but I know he’s sad. I don’t want him to be sad so I licked his face. That made him smile and then he licked me on the nose. I love him so much!
The other lady came back and sat down. She said something to my human. He made a big sigh and wrapped me tight and kissed me on the head.
The lady just stuck me with something! It stinged a lot and now I am getting really sleepy. Everything is slowing down. He has his nose on my nose. It’s weird, but I can understand human words now. He is crying. Then he said; “I love you Radar. You breathe out and I will breathe in; capturing your last breath. Now you will live forever in my heart.” That was the last thing I remember before I went to sleep.
When I opened my eyes I was a little scared. I couldn’t see him, but I feel him all around me so I’m not scared anymore. I see a bridge that looks like a rainbow. There are dogs and cats and humans and all kinds of animals on the other side. A big horsey is telling me to come over. It’s weird to understand horsey talk. All the animals and peoples look happy, so I walked over the bridge. I feel like a puppy again! The horsey told to wait and play by the water because someday my human will come over the rainbow bridge and we can be together forever.
Radar got her name from her oversized ears. She was a source of comfort in a stressful time. I had health issues and was working 60 to 100 hours a week. On the bright side, I was able to spend more time with her. She never left my side when I was at work. She was in poor health when she found me but I gave her two more years of a better life. I carried her to the rainbow bridge on September 21, 2015. I held her in my arms as she drew her last breath, which I captured as she slowly released it.
I’ve heard it said many times that Dog is God spelled backwards. It’s the other way around.
RM Ullrich, a man who knows the true meaning of Radar Love.